I was given an assignment for my theology class to create a mosaic. We had to recreate the icon of our choice. I instantly knew that I wanted to do Saint André. He is my patron saint and affects my daily life.
As I was doing this project, which took all day to complete, I noticed something beautiful. I was spending hours putting tiny pieces of paper onto a poster board that would later create a larger image of someone amazing. Isn’t that what God did? He created the Earth for us. Then, He created us with a specific plan in mind. He knew what trials we would face and who we would cross paths with. God has a plan, a beautiful plan for each of our lives. It may not be easy but God created us for a reason.
Then I got thinking about how stressful it is when pieces go missing. Imagine how God feels. He created each and every one of us with a specific plan in mind. He loves us as if we were the only ones He created. No matter how awful you feel, your piece has a purpose in God’s mosaic.
I didn’t always see it this way. During my freshman year in high school, I didn’t know where I was going or where I had been. Nothing made sense anymore. Honestly, I didn’t think that God had a purpose for my life. I found myself alone in my bedroom, texting a few juniors, trying to survive the pain. I didn’t think it would ever end. Countless questions like this were swirling through my head:
“God, are you really there? It just doesn’t make any sense.”
“If you’re really there, why did you abandon me?”
“Why’d you make me? This life seems to be some cruel punishment. I just… I can’t live like this anymore.”
Those questions wouldn’t leave. They were in my dreams. They greeted me every morning and told me goodnight. They followed me into the bathroom. These questions told me that I should end it all. All of the pain would be over if I just died, right? I tried. I attempted the irreversible. God stopped me. My knife wouldn’t work.
That was two years ago.
Since then, I found God. I got help from spiritual directors and in therapy. I reached out to my mom. God isn’t finished with me yet.
After my freshman year, I attended my first Steubenville Conference. God found my wandering soul. It was as if I was the only one there. I vowed to him that I would get help. Now, I seek him out in my daily life. He’s working in me. He’s working in all of you. He has a plan for your life. He’s there. He wants you. You are more than just a bunch of cells. Each day, repeat this powerful verse to yourself:
“’For I know well the plans I have in mind for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for woe, to give you a future full of hope.’” Jeremiah 29:11
He wants you. He’s speaking to you in things as simple as art projects. He’s in your bedroom. He’s in the school. He is everywhere. Our God wants a personal relationship with each and every one of us or He wouldn’t have created us. We are all pieces in that mosaic or we simply wouldn’t be here.
Editor’s Note: “In My Own Words” is a section of blogs on LifeTeen.com that contains submissions from our readers. If you love reading LifeTeen.com and want to contribute a blog about how you, as a teen, live out your Catholic Faith in your life, feel free to email your submission to Christina at cmead@lifeteen.com. Please keep submissions under 750 words.
