Why we Love Promposals

My high school experience was probably very similar to yours. I had a lot of “typical” high school memories, from Friday night football games to stress about the SAT. One memory that particularly stands out is prom and partaking in the national craze that is “promposing.”

The Big Dance

The girl I was asking was just a friend I had been close with since the start of high school. We agreed to go to prom together before the actual proposal so I had every reason not to be nervous and yet, I was a hot mess during the minutes leading up to the big ask.

We are both Harry Potter fans so my promposal involved a cheesy Harry Potter pickup line, a stuffed animal owl, and a letter from Hogwarts asking her to be my date.

AshPromposalSign

Luckily, a lot of people helped make it special for her. From coordinating when she would see me to recording the event to helping me make the posters (my arts and crafts skills aren’t the greatest), it felt like everybody wanted to be a part of this moment.

When the video of the promposal was posted on social media, people I didn’t even know were saying how much they loved the idea, how cute we looked, etc. While I was honored, I was left wondering, “What’s our obsession with promposals? Why do people, regardless of the level of friendship they have with the couple, either want to be a part of or watch promposals?” I grew to realize the answer to those questions is rather simple: We were made for love.

Inherent Desires

God created us to be loved and share that love. It doesn’t matter your age, race, grade, or what “clique” you’re a part of — everybody loves love. More specifically, everybody wants real, big love. We all have an inner desire for real, authentic love because God designed us to desire it. We were made in the image and likeness of God who is, among many other things, love itself (1 John 4:8). We were created out of love and modeled from the idea of love so it is only natural for us to want love.

Our attraction to promposals lies behind the fact that they are, in theory, an extraordinary display of love. As a promposer (which should be a word recognized by Merriam-Webster), I wanted to make the moment special and something to remember for my friend because she is special. After all, “it’s the night of all nights.”

Was it cute? Yes. Was it also a little over-the-top? Yes. I wanted to make it unique and while there’s nothing wrong with wanting to make someone feel special, making something grander doesn’t always mean the love behind it is grander as well.

The Bigger, The Better?

It seems like the need to make promposals more and more excessive has only increased with time. The popularity of social media increases the number of people who can see any given promposal. Some people (myself included) see this as an invitation to be all the more extra. There are more flash-mobs, big signs, and choreographed actions than ever before; and while the idea is admirable, we need to understand we’re trying to reach a level that is not possible for us to achieve. Promposals, while fun, will never match the love God offers us.

God is love itself so it only makes sense that He is the biggest love we can ever imagine. Our Lord is not only the most perfect love to exist but is also eager to share that love (aka Himself) with us. God loves us in every way possible and does everything for you to experience that love and fall in love with Him, from the smallest surprises throughout your day to becoming man, dwelling among us, and finally, dying on the cross.

This truth is a beautiful one to remember during this time of promposals because we get so caught up in making the moment special and unique that we forget the greatest proposal ever made to us. Promposals are wonderful but God made a much grander proposal to you before proms even existed. His proposal wasn’t made with flash-mobs or big posters; it was made with three nails, a piece of wood, and a crown of thorns.

Him First, us Second

Around the same time I was planning my promposal, I had the honor of being the promposee (another word that should be in Merriam-Webster). The promposal included one sign with sparklers (she and I have stories involving pyrotechnics — it’s a long story).

NatPromSign

The normal prom festivities took place: Formal pictures, dinner, and dancing to Cupid Shuffle. Something we did that is not usually a part of the typical high school experience was go to Adoration before the dance. I sat toward the back of the chapel and after I was done praying, I took in what I was seeing. High school kids, in full prom attire, kneeling in front of the Blessed Sacrament.

In some ways it felt weird but in more ways, it felt right. On the night that’s referred to as “the night of nights,” we gave thanks to the king of kings. Was that night magical and memorable? Yes, but without God, none of it, or us, would exist. The love He designed us from is one that when returned back to Him, is more rewarding than even the most creative promposal.

If you’re planning or are part of a promposal, I hope it’s as memorable as mine and leaves you with memories you will never let go of. But, remember that God’s love for you (yes, you) is far more than you can imagine and . If you know that, prom will be a night you not only won’t forget, but won’t want to end.

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