The Gospels According to 2019 Music

2019 was a year for the ears. Get it? Like, “a year for the books,” but for ears? Because we’re talking about music? No? Cool. Okay. Word.

Anyways, music in 2019 was awesome in my opinion and a great finale to the 2010s. We got more Tyler, the Creator, Billie Eilish, Post Malone, Solange, BROCKHAMPTON, Maggie Rogers, Khalid, Halsey… the list goes on and on. As a music lover who is Christian, I find myself making comparisons between the music I listen to and the Truths of our Christian faith that I know. Yeah, a lot of times those comparisons are facepalm moments, asking myself, “why is my brain so weird?” But guess what? I don’t care. Because it’s cringy. And funny. So, please enjoy this mix of corny, sad, reflective, and funny comparisons of the Bible to some songs.

This is… The gospels according to the music of 2019.

DISCLAIMER…
Yeah, these are all SECULAR songs. If you’re offended by this blog, loosen up. It’s a joke.

MATTHEW

“She told me put my heart in the bag, and nobody gets hurt”
-Juice WRLD, “Robbery”
“For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be.”
-Matthew 6:21

“All the lights couldn’t put out the dark runnin’ through my heart”
-Harry Styles, “Lights Up”
“And if the light in you is darkness, how great will the darkness be.”
-Matthew 6:23

“You say the word and I’ll go anywhere blindly.”
-Jonas Brothers, “Sucker”
“He said to him, ‘Follow me.’ And he got up and followed him.”
-Matthew 9:9

“I jump stomp-stomp on Lucifer, Satan”
-Chance the Rapper, “Hot Shower”
“Get behind me, Satan! You are an obstacle to me.”
-Matthew 16:23

“I want to be with you ’til the world ends.”
-Coldplay, “Orphans”
“And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.”
-Matthew 28:20

MARK

“I’ve never seen anybody do the things you do before”
-Tones and I, “Dance Monkey”
“We have never seen anything like this.”
-Mark 2:12

“I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.”
-Ariana Grande, “7 Rings”
“‘Go, sell what you have, and give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven.’”
-Mark 10:21

LUKE

“Here’s to the ones that we got.”
-Maroon 5, “Memories”
“I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you…”
-Luke 22:15

“I dare you to do somethin’.”
-Post Malone, “Circles”
“One of the criminals hanging there reviled Jesus, saying, ‘Are you not the Messiah? Save yourself and us.’”
-Luke 23:40

“I’m the bad guy… Duh!”
-Billie Eilish, “Bad Guy”
“The other, however, rebuking him, said in reply, “Have you no fear of God, for you are subject to the same condemnation? We have been condemned justly… but this man has done nothing criminal.”
-Luke 23:41

JOHN

“Tall time to call your Ma, hey Ma, hey Ma.”
-Bon Iver, “Hey, Ma”
“The mother of Jesus said to him, ‘They have no wine.’ And Jesus said to her, ‘Woman…’”
-John 2:4

“Cause when it all comes crashing down I’ll need you.”
-Tyler, the Creator, “EARFQUAKE”
“Master, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
-John 6:68

“I’m gonna take my horse to the old town road”
-Lil Nas X, “Old Town Road (Remix)”
“Jesus found an ass and sat upon it.”
-John 12:14

“Can’t we just talk? Figure out where we’re going?”
-Khalid, “Talk”
“Master, we do not know where you are going; how can we know the way?”
-John 14:5

“Everything means nothing if I can’t have you.”
-Shawn Mendes, “If I Can’t Have You”
“Without me you can do nothing.”
-John 15:5

“Said you’d take a bullet, told me you would die for me.”
-Post Malone, “Die For Me”
“No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
-John 15:13

“You’re my best friend, please stay true.”
-PARTYNEXTDOOR, “Loyal”
“You are my friends if you do what I command you.”
-John 15:14

“As we go on, we remember all the times we spent together. As our lives change from whatever,
we will still be friends forever.”
-Benny Blanco, Juice WRLD “Graduation”
“So you also are now in anguish. But I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you.”
-John 16:22

These songs don’t even scratch the surface of the music released in 2019, but it’s a start. Didn’t see your favorite 2019 song on here? Try this at home with your selection of music! It’s harder than it looks. Make it as corny as you can, but, for all of our sakes… don’t put it on a t-shirt. Peace and blessings to all of y’all, and have a great 2020!

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