This one’s for all you ladies — I have a hunch some of you can relate to an experience of mine… Once upon a time, I kinda had a crush on a boy. And once upon a time, said boy kinda didn’t necessarily have a crush on me. And so I wallowed in my sadness […]
Come on daddy-dearest-God, all I ever wanted was a man with the voice of Benedict Cumberbach, and the looks of the dude who lives across the street from me, and the money of Brad Pitt, and the heart of Jesus… Is that so hard to ask?
So option numero uno for today is to soothe yourself by lying around in your PINK yoga pants watching Netflix and eating pasta because carbs are your comforting frenemy.
Every single day has been perfect… we’ve never had an argument, never disagreed, and never gotten frustrated. Our home is perfect. Our kids are perfect. Our family is a walking Christmas card. No one ever fights, has gas or morning breath or bad hair days. Each morning, servants bring us freshly squeezed orange juice and non-fat, extra foam lattes, whilst animated Disney birds gather on our balcony to whistle us awake. Yes, we are never tired, have no body fat, no wrinkles and my gray hair is highlighting that I pay extra money for at the barbershop.
As I got older, I think it was around 6th grade, when I started really anticipating Valentine’s Day. Why? Maybe because it was the first time I had a huge crush on a guy. I still remember the feeling, the butterflies in my stomach when I saw him… Of course this boy didn’t know I existed… (surprise, surprise). But I would close my eyes and imagine that he was my valentine and I was his. Gross I know, right? Anyway, needless to say I didn’t receive any Valentine’s that year from any boys, except the ones from my daddy and little brothers.
Every year I found myself somewhat disappointed in my Valentine’s Day. I’ve never had a boyfriend or any guy in a position to be my Valentine. But I guess I always thought well maybe this Valentine’s Day will be different. Maybe i’ll have a secret admirer, or a boyfriend (yeah right), etc…
It turns out he was right! Shortly after ending things with my boyfriend, the uncle of one my students asked me out. Turns out he had seen me months earlier and wanted to ask me out, but heard I had a boyfriend and stayed away.
One year later, we were married.
Now it doesn’t always happen this fast. But it’s not going to happen at all if you cling to mediocre or bad relationships. Likewise, if you’re single – entering into a relationship just to be dating is not going to improve your chances of finding the right guy.
Warning: first I'm going to rant, then I shall apologize, and then I will offer a solution for you because I'm nice like that. And because I like you and want you to be happier than you look in your #foreveralone selfie and sound in your #foreveralone tweet.