Q: I know I should break up with my boyfriend, but we’ve broken up before and gotten back together. I feel like our relationship isn’t the best for me, but I really care about him. What should I do? A: I understand that you care for your boyfriend. Breaking up with someone does not mean […]
You talk a lot about how a man should treat a woman. What I never hear though is how a woman can accept that. I really struggle with feeling like I don’t deserve to be treated with respect and I’m worthless, so it always feels awkward for me to let a guy be a gentleman. I don’t know what I should do about it. Do you have any advice?
Knowing that God loves you just as you are allows you to be yourself on a date. Since you are loved by Him, there’s no need to question whether or not you are lovable. Knowing that you were uniquely created, with your own beauty and mystery, will help you “guard your heart” and not feel like you have to share every detail of your life early in the dating process. Knowing that God wants us to love others will guide you to be respectful and thoughtful on a date.
Saint John Paul II wrote “It is the duty of every man to uphold the dignity of every woman.” If you can keep this in mind, you’ll never have a bad date.
This doesn’t mean you’ll never have an awkward date or that every first date will lead to a second date. Trust me. One of my dates involved me getting sick in the middle of a restaurant called “Thai-Tanic.” The date was about as successful as the ship they named the restaurant after.
Q: How do you keep your marriage and faith related? In other words, what things do you and your husband (Brian) do every day to lead each other closer to Christ?
Secondly, it’s false. She says men have two options: 1) look at porn, or 2) look at you.
And by “look at you,” I assume she doesn’t mean, “look at you while you’re praying the rosary on your evening walk together.”
No, she means either a guy will lust over you or someone else. It’s like saying, “either your boyfriend will be obese or he’ll be anorexic.” Isn’t there a third option? Like, maybe he’ll be healthy? And there is such a thing as sexual health, we call it chastity. Though chastity may conjure up images of either uncomfortable belts or the notion of repressing sexuality in the name of “abstinence”… chastity is neither of these things but so much more.
Q: I’ve noticed that every time I meet a new guy, and we start to become friends, I instantly start looking at our relationship as a potential “more than friends” kind of relationship. Sometimes I take it as far as imagining what life would be like if I did marry that person. I’m not sure how to get out of this. I want to be friends with guys.
Choosing to center your relationship on Christ is going to bring you the most peace and lasting happiness. I’m glad that you want more for yourself than to settle for falling into a pattern of sin.
Sometimes we, as Catholics, think going to Confession and promising it (our sin) won’t happen again will magically give us the power to stop sinning. While Confession is a great start, it is just that – a starting place. God gives us grace to continue moving forward, He offers us help to avoid sin, and we have to do our part to follow His path to holiness.
In some places, the pressure to date is ridiculous. Boys and girls used to be total opposites, gross even, and now they suddenly look a little more interesting… And when they start to pair off, I know that it can be tough to be left behind on that. It would be totally awesome if someone that you liked also thought that you were cute, funny, smart, and interesting — but let me ask you a question: Would you rather have the tennis courts or the front porch? Please, don’t waste your first kiss.
In my life, I struggled with the same fear. I couldn’t seem to stay in a relationship because I would freak out and back away from the girl in fear that I would eventually get hurt. When I finally met my wife, it wasn’t that my fears had disappeared, but my desire to pursue a relationship with Courtney was greater than my fears of being hurt.
I have great news for you: a good guy already loves you! Your value and your dignity, on your best day or after your worst decision, can be found in looking at a crucifix. Jesus didn’t lay down His life just hoping that humanity would be nicer and more deserving of Him. He loved us, and still loves us, in the middle of our shady pasts and our messy presents.
Q: My boyfriend and I are moving away to college next semester, except he’s going to be over 3 hours away now. I was wondering do you have any advice or tips on how to keep a strong God centered relationship going, even through there will be a distance between us? Is it even healthy to have a relationship like this? I would really appreciate some help to this subject.
We who frequent the internet all know what happened this past week: James Franco connected with a 17 year old fan on Instagram and then texted her in an attempt to arrange a “meet up” at a hotel. Can we collectively say “creep-a-trillion”!?!?
I would meet up with you James Franco. BUT not because I’m interested in flirting or (heaven forbid) locking lips with you. Oh no. I would only want to meet you in order to give you a Jason Evert style lesson on real love over a nice glass of ice water.
So was it wrong that I had once had a crush on my friend’s future husband? No, I don’t think so. Having a crush on someone is totally normal. There’s nothing wrong with being attracted to someone else, and it’s good to be drawn to those good characteristics that we notice in them. We’re designed to interact and form relationships with other people. As we spend time with others, it’s totally normal to find ourselves “crushing” on someone because we think he’s really funny or cute or sweet or witty or holy or, worst of all, all of the above!!
Come on daddy-dearest-God, all I ever wanted was a man with the voice of Benedict Cumberbach, and the looks of the dude who lives across the street from me, and the money of Brad Pitt, and the heart of Jesus… Is that so hard to ask?
So option numero uno for today is to soothe yourself by lying around in your PINK yoga pants watching Netflix and eating pasta because carbs are your comforting frenemy.
Every single day has been perfect… we’ve never had an argument, never disagreed, and never gotten frustrated. Our home is perfect. Our kids are perfect. Our family is a walking Christmas card. No one ever fights, has gas or morning breath or bad hair days. Each morning, servants bring us freshly squeezed orange juice and non-fat, extra foam lattes, whilst animated Disney birds gather on our balcony to whistle us awake. Yes, we are never tired, have no body fat, no wrinkles and my gray hair is highlighting that I pay extra money for at the barbershop.
Guys and girls are some of the worlds biggest mysteries… well, to each other anyway. This can make dating pretty complicated. As a guy, I rarely know what the girls in my life are thinking. Classmate, co-worker, sister, friend, girlfriend, mom… it doesn’t matter.
Sometimes I think I understand Calculus better than I understand girls. And umm… I got a D in Calculus.
I remember feeling kind of like a failure when I graduated from college. All five of my siblings married someone that they went to college with, and my last dating relationship had recently ended. I had my bachelor’s degree, but my wife was nowhere to be found. Many of my good friends got married within the first year or two after graduation, and I felt like I was destined to either be single forever or eventually just settle for some less-than-exciting relationship.
I’ve been best friends with a guy for awhile. But now I feel like there could be something more to our relationship. I am scared to tell him how I feel, scared to ruin our awesome friendship, yet I feel so ready to be in a relationship. Should I tell him how I feel?