Dating Disasters: Confessions of a Catholic Single

I always have the worst dates.

Seriously, the movie How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days has nothing on me. My dating disasters have been frequent and broad in their range of humiliation: I have been taken to the hospital, spilled my drink over my date's new couch, called the guy by the wrong name, got lost and stuck in a ditch, and laughed so hard I choked on my meal nearly causing the waiter to perform the Heimlich.

And you wonder why I am still single?

But wait there's more. Here are my top two worst date experiences.

Funny Mass Stories

After the man picks up the statue, he turns around and immediately walks out of the church with it. Middle of the Wedding. Just takes the statue out of the church. It's a huge church.

We sat down for the first reading and I realize that the bride has to lay flowers at the statue of our lady … it's in the program. And there's no statue of Our Lady whatsoever because someone has stolen it from the church during the wedding!