Amanda Cassar

I’m a Wimp.

This year during the first few weeks I was a missionary, I begged the Lord to give me a spirit of courage. Well when you ask for something the Lord will deliver, even in ways that you never thought imaginable.

Throughout most of college I wouldn’t call myself a wimp. I was the person people called when there was a spider crawling within 100 feet of their body. I’m the person who would walk through the dark of the night to find a lost friend even if that meant almost getting eaten by a deer. (That’s a story for another time.) My roommates would refer to me as “the brave one” or would often call me “fearless.”

I think it’s possible to be fearless but not courageous. That idea of being fearless but not courageous was brought to the light when I began this mission year.

On our Sabbath this past week I wasn’t sure what I was going to do but one of my sisters had this incredible idea to go hike at Tallulah Gorge. Normally I wouldn’t choose to go on a hike, especially on a day of rest. But, it was a beautiful day and I wasn’t sure when I would have this opportunity again so I took it.

The hike started out great, we literally walked down 500 steps. Then the scary part came. We had to cross over these HUGE boulders with water below us. Now the water wasn’t moving any faster than say the way water would come out of a garden hose but for some reason I became completely paralyzed and my hands and legs were shaking.

I wouldn’t take that first step of faith even though my sisters were lovingly encouraging me along. Eventually, after a lot of convincing, I took the first step. After that first step I wasn’t afraid!

This is the same thing with my faith life. If I just take that one leap of faith, then I know the Lord will swoop in and take away all my fear. I have been lacking courage in my prayer life, in my desire to be vulnerable in community, and most opportunities the Lord is calling me to grow in. As I continue to pray through John 14:27 which says, “Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful,” I beg for you to pray for me as I continue to wrestle with this verse in my prayer.

My prayer is to be more courageous in each area that the Lord is calling me to dive deeper into.

Where is God calling you to be courageous?

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Amanda Cassar

About the Author

I'm from Long Island. I have a funny accent. I can't eat Gluten or Dairy, and I really love Jesus.