I recently read a reflection about Lent that was centered on Mark 1:15—“‘This is the time of fulfillment. The kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel.’” The question was asked, “Who was Jesus talking to?” Not everyone in the crowd was living an immoral life, surely. In fact, most of the people Jesus spoke to were Jews, trying their best to live and uphold the faith they believed in. Therefore, the conversion they had to experience was not a radical one, from a life of debauchery to one with faith in God. Rather, they had to convert from thinking about the kingdom of God to living the kingdom of God.
The missionaries were on an “Alive in the Spirit” retreat this week, and one thing that stuck out to me was the point that we talk a lot about “one day when I get to heaven, I’ll finally be at the right hand of God,” but as Christians who believe in the Trinity, because we are part of the ascended body of Christ and have the Holy Spirit within us by nature of our baptism, we’re already at the right hand of God.
Do I live my life as if that’s true?
No. I don’t.
I’ve realized over and over again, especially recently, that I have “trust issues.” I don’t trust others as easily as I used to. Sadly, that mistrust extends even to God. I don’t trust him as much as he deserves.
If Lent is truly going to be a season of conversion, I need to live the truth of my existence—that the kingdom of God is not only at hand, but I am IN the throne room. If I’m in the throne room, sitting at the right hand of the King, witnessing all of his works, shouldn’t he have all my trust? What more does he have to do to win my heart?
Lord, thank you for pursuing me relentlessly. Thank you for letting me into the throne room. I pray that I would be able to truly rest here, and grow in intimacy and trust with you. Amen.