So I keep staring at the mission page thinking to myself “Carrie, today you have to write a blog, anything is better then nothing.” I’ve been doing this to myself for weeks now, pulling up the site reading the ways God is moving in all the other missionary’s lives, and thinking what to write.
Now I’m not saying God is not moving in my life. He is. He is moving mountains in my heart. He is tearing down walls I’ve been building up since high school. He is moving. The problem is I don’t know how to express it. I want so desperately to stand atop a mountain a sing, shout, scream, excreta, the words just won’t come.
I’m hoping this block in my head won’t last long. I really do want to share my heart, with my community and with all you blog readers. The thing is God doesn’t want me to do that yet. If He did, I would have a million things to write about I would be filling up page after page on the mission site, I would be atop a mountain shouting so everyone could hear.
Until that day comes, the Lord keeps bringing me back to verse from scripture. It’s on of my favorites:
“Be still and know that I am God” Psalm 46:11
So that is what I am trying to do. I’m trying to Be. I’m not always sure it’s working out that way God wants it, but I’m putting forth my best effort. Hopefully He will bless this time of trying, and of waiting.