Q: I feel guilty. Yesterday I had sex with my boyfriend. Will I go to hell because I’m not married?
A: Thanks for your honesty in this matter and it is a truly serious matter indeed. You made a decision that will change everything in your life. I don’t mean to sound too melodramatic, but you now stand at a crossroads. You mentioned a fear of going to hell, well, I’d like to think that our all-loving God would not judge damnation because of one sinful act, still the crossroads have been reached. The Book of Deuteronomy says, “I’ll have set before you life and death, the blessing and a curse. Choose life, then, that you may live.” (30:19). Don’t let this sin become a part of your everyday life. If you truly want to be a person of God, and if you want your relationship with your boyfriend to be something holy, don’t let sinful acts, such as having sex before marriage, keep you from the life Christ wants you to live in Him.
It is serious what you have done, but don’t live in guilt…go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation and heal this wound on your soul. Then find the time to talk to someone you trust, a priest, a nun or a youth minister and let them help you find a way to keep yourself from falling back into this kind of pattern in your relationship. I’ll be praying for you, and remember…choose life!