Ah, flirting. That ancient art of trying to get the attention of someone you're attracted to while trying to prevent oneself from looking like a complete tool. I'll never forget my friend from kindergarten who thought he would win a girl's heart by putting all of his toy cars in envelopes and giving them to her each morning as gifts. By third grade we had matured and moved on to advanced techniques like ignoring or teasing the girls that we liked.
It wasn't until junior high and high school that I learned the art of enlisting a girl's friends to get information as to whether or not the girl might be open to the possibility of attending the upcoming dance with me.
Some people define flirting as pretending to be interested in another person, but I'm talking about it in terms of showing an interest in someone that you're attracted to. You know, like those weird things boy animals do when they're trying to impress a girl animal? That's what I'm talking about . . .
Guys, here are some suggestions:
- Say It to Her Face. Don't hide behind the screen. You may think it's a bold, romantic gesture because you wrote it on her Facebook wall, you asked her out via a text message, or you posted your love confession on Twitter, but you'll impress her more if you say it in person. Go ahead and take the risk. Saying it to her face let's her know that she's worth the risk of embarrassment or rejection.
- Honor Her. If you're going to compliment her on what you like about her, make sure you include things that she can take credit for. Don't just tell her how pretty she looks, make sure you point out virtues and strengths you see in her character. By mentioning the qualities and virtues you see in her, you'll show that you appreciate the fact that her beauty isn't just an appearance.
- Don't Be Fake. If you're not interested in a girl, then don't act like you are. It's that simple. It's confusing and hurtful when you lead someone on.
- Treat Her Like Royalty. If you end up getting to take her out on a date, do it right. Open doors, pull back chairs (before she sits down, not as she's getting into the chair), walk her to her door, and pay for the date. Let her know by your actions that you value her. This doesn't mean you have to spend a lot of money, it just means that you should put some thought and attention into it.