Christina Mead

Everyone’s Doing It

A blissfully innocent older man said to me recently, 'did you know that they started handing out condoms in schools?' I didn't have the heart to tell him I'd known this for a long time.

Do you know why they hand out condoms at your school? Or why there's a push for more and more over-the-counter birth control? And free birth control?

Because the assumption is 'everyone's doing it.' And since you're going to 'do it anyway' with multiple people, outside of marriage, you need protection. You need to be allowed to do whatever you want without regrets.

This opinion is held by the government, the doctor who wants to give you a HPV shot 'just in case,' your sex-ed teacher, and maybe even some of your parents. They think you just can't control yourself and with the combination of your age, hormones, and lack of sound judgement, you're just going to hook up with any guy or girl.

Essentially . . . we young people are seen as animals. Rabbits, cats, dogs . . . they're just going to do it anyway. Whenever they get the urge, or it's a certain time of year, they just go for it. No regrets, no commitments, no emotions involved, and no broken hearts or tears on the pillowcase. Just sex.

Please tell me that you want more than just sex. Don't you want to be loved? I do. It's inscribed on our hearts.

'God created man in His own image and likeness: calling him to existence through love, He called him at the same time for love. God is love and in Himself He lives a mystery of personal loving communion. Creating the human race in His own image and continually keeping it in being, God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation, and thus the capacity and responsibility, of love and communion. Love is therefore the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being' (Blessed John Paul II, Familiaris Consortio, 11).

I have a need for love that demands more than empty, casual sex without commitment.

I want a love that's strong enough to wait for marriage and commitment. Someone who wants what's best for me and my body. I'm not looking for someone who's okay with me chemically altering my body for the sake of pleasure without consequences.

I want the consequences – but I want them in marriage where they're supposed to be. I want to feel bonded to another person, body and soul (Genesis 2:24). I want to be faithful to one person and give myself fully, freely, and allow that to bear the fruit of children.

What about you? The choice is yours. No matter what decisions you've made in the past, every day is a new beginning. Every day you have the opportunity to choose the virtue of purity. God came to set us free from sin. Salvation means we are freed from being slaves to our bodies. We have the grace to say “no, I will wait.”

God's greatest gift to us is free will. So go ahead, do whatever you want. It's your life. But before you go ahead and just 'do it anyway,' make sure you know what you want and how you want to be treated – like an animal or a human being.

We need to let the world know that we aren't controlled by our bodies and that love is more than self-gratification. You and I have the ability, right now, to say “yes” to true love and “no” to the stereotype that “everyone’s doing it.”

I’m praying for you.

Christina Mead

About the Author

I'm just striving for sainthood through lots of imperfect ways. I daydream about heaven, where I want to be the patron saint of lifeguards. I think I might paint my nails just so I can pick it off. I wrote a book about Mary and what she taught us about being a Catholic girl. It's called "That One Girl" and I think you'd like it! You can email me at [email protected], or follow me on Twitter @LT_Christina.