Pentecost Sunday Reading: Acts 2:1-11; Ps 104:1, 24, 29-30, 31, 34; 1 Cor 12:3b-7, 12-13 or Gal 5:16-25; Jn 20:19-23 or Jn 15:26-27; 16:12-15

Readings for the Solemnity of the Ascension of the Lord: Acts 1:1-11; Ps 47:2-3, 6-7, 8-9; Eph 1:17-23 or Eph 4:1-13; Mk 16:15-20

I’m a girl and I love weddings.

Big surprise, huh? I’ve spent many of my 22 years dreaming up the most perfect wedding. And since the creation of Pinterest, the harmless dreaming has become a borderline-addictive pinning-spree of dresses, cakes and the world’s most adorable flower girl outfits. So, it’s only natural, that I fell in love with the story of the Wedding at Cana when I started praying the rosary regularly last year.

This photo may or may not be from Pinterest . . .

I was never a daily rosary person, in fact, praying the rosary was my least favorite way to pray. But once I discovered how much I could learn from praying and meditating on the mysteries, it became one of my favorite prayers.

I started with what I liked (weddings), opened my heart, and the next thing I knew, I had a much deeper understanding of the importance of the Wedding at Cana and Mary’s role in my faith grew in leaps and bounds.

They Have No Wine

Mary’s first line in this wedding story is, “They have no wine” (John 2:3). Those four words never seemed that important to me until I put them into context. You see, no one knew who Jesus truly was at the wedding, He hadn’t performed any miracles yet, or given any teachings; but Mary took the servant’s worries of having no wine to her Son anyway.

Mary didn’t need to explain the situation or even ask Jesus to do anything; she just trusted and believed in Him. Those four, simple words were Mary’s prayer, “They have no wine.” She let Jesus know what was wrong, and then left it in His hands. When I have a problem, my prayers usually become a long session of whining, complaining, and worrying. If we live by Mary’s example, she teaches us that God only needs us to put our problems in His hands and trust Him.

Do Whatever He Tells You

Mary’s second and last line in the story of the Wedding at Cana is, “Do whatever He tells you” (John 2:5). This might be the best piece of advice anyone can give. Ever. In all of eternity. Period.

Mary lived her whole life following God's will

After Mary told Jesus about the lack of wine, He didn’t tell her what He was going to, but she already knew the solution. That’s because Mary’s entire life was based on doing God’s will.

Mary has shown me that what Jesus says is always the answer I am seeking and the solution to every problem I have. When Mary told the servants to do whatever Jesus tells them, she became a perfect mirror of Christ; and she remains one today. You can’t look to Mary for guidance without seeing her Son; she wants nothing more than to point us back to Jesus and His will. Because of this, the more I grow in my relationship with Mary, the more I grow in my relationship with Jesus.

A Lesson from Mary

So what began as a girly obsession with weddings, has ended up teaching me just how important Mary is in my life. Her example at the Wedding at Cana showed me how to approach the Lord with complete trust. I’ve learned how much Mary desires me to follow the will of her Son. Who would have thought all that could come from two short sentences in a simple story?

If you take the time to pray through the mysteries of the rosary, I guarantee you’ll find some pretty life changing stuff hiding between the lines. I know I did.

At a conference for High School journalists, Dan Savage gave a talk that was supposed to be about anti-bullying. Instead it was anti-Christian. As he began to talk about the “bullish*t” of what can be found in the Bible, many Christian students stood up and walked out on him – a move he later called “pansy-assed.” Here’s the video. It’s about three minutes, but be forewarned there is some swearing going on in it (not suitable if kids are nearby).

The video has gone viral since being posted three days ago, the vast majority of people giving it a “like.” The comments below the video are horrifically anti-gay and only go to further the disgusting stereotype that Savage is bashing in his speech.

My first reaction to this video was shock. I couldn’t believe that someone could speak like that in such a public forum. If a speaker in a similar forum talked about how Jesus died for all of our sins he or she would have been rushed off the stage. But I quickly got over that. St. Peter wrote, “Don’t be surprised that a trial is occurring among you, as if something strange were happening to you.” (1 Peter 4:12) Christians should expect to be persecuted.

I Feel Bad For Dan Savage . . .

My next reaction was sympathy. There was a part of me that felt bad for him. Here is a man who has been abused by people claiming to be Christian. He references being insulted and physically beat up while others have died over this. And for him the source of blame is the Bible.

He suggests that we should overlook the prohibitions in the Bible regarding same sex activity just as we overlook things like stoning women who are adulterers. I teach a course on Scripture at Franciscan University of Steubenville and I’ll be honest: it’s hard to read things like that in Scripture. Interestingly enough, the reason we find it hard to read is because we’ve been transformed by Christ who we also learn about in the Bible. For there are many cultures (who don’t read the Bible) who would still agree with those kind of behaviors.

Barbaric Humanity

If the law of God seems barbaric in the Old Testament, we have to remember that it was because 3,500 years ago humanity was barbaric, at least by our Western civilization standards of the 21st century. When you hear of the genocides that still occur today you can argue that not much has changed in some places in the world.

God slowly revealed Himself to the Israelites so that through them the world might learn what it truly means to live and love through the example and teaching of Jesus Christ. We don’t stone women anymore for adultery—”Let he who is without sin cast the first stone” is one of the most famous lines of Jesus (John 8). In fact, we don’t believe in capital punishment at all (unless keeping the prisoner alive is a danger to society—an argument that makes more sense when prisoners were kept in tents and clay houses than billion dollar penitentiaries.)

Is the Bible Pro-Slavery?

Savage mentions that “the Bible is a radically pro-slavery document.” I believe this accusation to be purposefully ignorant. Yes, St. Paul wrote of the respect and duty that slaves should have for their masters and masters for their slaves. But while the term “slave” is used in broad terms in both the Old and New Testament, it is NEVER used in the way it was experienced in America (capturing people from their native land, selling them off for profit, denying rights, justifying abuse . . . ).

The Jewish people experienced that kind of slavery at the hand of the Egyptians and a strong part of their Law was to not do that to anyone else.

The Jewish people were strongly opposed to slavery since they were slaves themselves for years

In the Jewish custom, a slave was more like an indentured servant who could only sell themselves, not be sold by someone else. And after six years they’d have to be released unless they begged their master to be a servant for life (Exodus 21:5) and even then only the judges could decide if that could happen.

But I understand Savage’s deeper point. In the time of slavery in America, some slave owners used the Bible to justify their actions. They were wrong to do so. In our current time, there are many Americans who bully and discriminate against people with same sex attractions and use the Bible to justify their actions.

Guess what? They are wrong to do so, too.

Love One Another

Christianity has much to atone for in the way we have treated people with homosexual attractions. If only we were as shocked at the way the media portrays sinful heterosexual activity! It’s too easy to be shocked and disgusted at the sins we aren’t tempted to commit because we have no sympathy for the offender. (Whereas we are naturally kinder to people who struggle with our same issues.) Jesus didn’t say, “Love one another . . . except for the gays.”

We are all commanded by Christ to love as He loved us and to treat each other with the dignity that comes from being made in the image and likeness of God. It seems clear to me that Dan Savage has never experienced that love from people who claim to know Christ but instead has experienced the opposite. And that’s why I feel such sorrow when I hear him speak.

However, just because people get the Bible wrong doesn’t mean the Bible is wrong.

Savage (and others) think the Bible and Christianity is the problem. If that were true then cultures not formed on the Bible should be tolerant and accepting of homosexual behavior . . . but that is not always the case.

In a 2007 Pew Survey that asked if homosexuality should be accepted in society, Latin America, Western Europe, and Central Europe found about half agreeing with that idea. But Southern and Eastern Europe, the Middle East, huge portions of Asia and all of Africa strongly disagreed. It’s hard to suggest that the Bible has influenced predijuce in China and India. (See the study here, page 35.)

And though I feel some sympathy for the man, that doesn’t mean I sympathize at all with his position. He’s wrong and I think it was horrible that he used that opportunity with high school teenagers to bash the Bible. He would have been way more effective sharing with those teenagers the pain of being judged and condemned by people with religious beliefs than attacking Christianity. He was “fighting back” to a group of kids who hadn’t done him any harm. It was immature and inappropriate.

The Anti-Bully Bully

I was proud of the students who walked out on him. It wasn’t “pansy-assed.” It was just the opposite. In Savage’s attempt to teach teens about not discriminating against homosexuals, he became the bully.

Who's being the bully here?

The world won’t see it that way. His anti-Christian rhetoric will be justified as “righteous anger” that blames all people of faith for any unjust act done against a person with same-sex attraction. More and more in society today, people think to be Christian is to be a bigot. They think that we who believe that sex was made for a man and woman in marriage should hang our head in shame and stay home on voting day to atone for our sins.

Sadly, many Christians are doing just that. These issues are driving many away from the Church. It reminds me of something the artist formerly known as Ratzinger wrote in 1970 (from his book Faith and the Future, this quote taken from here) :

“The church will become small and will have to start afresh more or less from the beginning.

She will no longer be able to inhabit many of the edifices she built in prosperity. As the number of her adherents diminishes . . . she will lose many of her social privileges. . . As a small society, [the Church] will make much bigger demands on the initiative of her individual members…

The real crisis has scarcely begun. We will have to count on terrific upheavals. But I am equally certain about what will remain at the end: not the Church of the political cult, which is dead already, but the Church of faith. She may well no longer be the dominant social power to the extent that she was until recently; but she will enjoy a fresh blossoming and be seen as man’s home, where he will find life and hope beyond death.”

Smaller but stronger. A Church who’s strength is built not on the amount of her followers but the depth of her love for God and neighbor.

What Do We Do?

So how should we treat those who speak against us? With love.

How should we behave towards those with same sex attractions? Love.

What should we do to those who support and provide abortions? Love.

How should we treat our enemies? Love.

Jesus forgiving the sins of Mary Magdalen

But – and forgive me for using a phrase that Savage employed – not a “pansy-ass” love that says that everything is fine no matter what you do. A love that is rooted in truth. A love that is rooted in mercy. A love that is rooted in Jesus Christ.

Our love of God and neighbor means we can’t be silent on these issues, no matter what persecution we will face, no matter what people may think of us when we do. And when we speak we must do so “with gentleness and reverence, keeping your conscience clear, so that, when you are maligned, those who defame your good conduct in Christ may themselves be put to shame. For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that be the will of God, than from doing evil.” (1 Peter 3:16-17)

Don’t expect to be understood. Don’t be surprised at the trial. And don’t lose hope for this culture. “Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13:8)

Read more from Bob at his blog Bob-Rice.com

I received a tweet this morning asking me who the Patron Saint for students taking exams is. In case you’re wondering, it’s St. Joseph of Cupertino.

For those of you needing to know that little fact, you may also want to consider asking St. Jude Thaddeus to pray with you (he’s the patron saint of hopeless causes).

At any rate, it’s always around this time of year that I see an increase in emails, tweets, posts, etc. from people asking for prayers and seeking minor miracles in their academic lives, or when discerning their futures.

It’s great timing, actually, since during the Easter Season we spend every week hearing about Christ’s Resurrection appearances and the amazing feats of boldness and logically inexplicable activity in the Acts of the Apostles. There’s no better time to talk miracles, it seems.

Ever Wonder What “Miracle” Means

The word “miracle” comes from a Latin term meaning “object of wonder.” Miracles are events that both defied human logic and also revealed God’s glorious wonder; quite literally, miracles are wonderful.

The New Testament reminds us that Christ and His apostles (through the power of the Holy Spirit) offered not merely “signs” of God’s power, but what were described repeatedly as “signs and wonders” (Matthew 24:24; Mark 13:22; John 4:48; Acts 4:30, 5:12, 14:3, 15:12; Romans 15:19; 2 Corinthians 12:12, 2 Thessalonians 2:9 and Hebrews 2:4).

They Did What?

One of the reasons I love the book of Acts so much is because of the amazing miracle stories. They aren’t just high drama; many of them are also high comedy. Let’s take a look at some of the miracles in the Acts of the Apostles:

• Acts 5:15: Peter is so filled with the Holy Spirit that even his shadow has the power to heal, a fact that makes Groundhog Day even less impressive.
• Acts 8:39: after teaching about Christ and baptizing the Ethiopian eunuch, the Holy Spirit snatched Philip immediately in a scene almost reminiscent of Star Trek.
• Acts 9:36-42: Peter raises Tabitha from the dead. Almost as impressive is that Tabitha was also known named “Dorcas.” I think it’s clear why she went by Tabitha.
• Acts 20:9-12: a young man named Eutychus falls asleep and to his death out a third story window in the middle of Mass. St. Paul later brings him back to life. Moral of the story? Don’t fall asleep during a homily.
• Acts 28:3-6: a poisonous viper sprung out of a campfire and latched onto St. Paul’s arm, only to be thrust off with Paul suffering no harm. The witnesses then thought Paul was a god. It’s a shame YouTube wasn’t around back then.

In addition to all of these, apostles were witnessed healing the blind (9:17-18), the paralyzed (9:33-35), the lame (14:7-9), the possessed (16:16-18), and even a man with severe diarrhea (28:7-8) . . . you see, the Bible has everything!

Acts of the Apostles also has three dramatic jailbreaks (5:17-25; 12:5-11; 16:25-30), divinely inspired pyrotechnics at Pentecost (2:2-6), healing relics (19:11-12) and a worship service so powerful that the earth quaked (4:31)!

In the midst of all of these powerful acts of the apostles, however, we cannot forget the “formula” . . . the apostles don’t perform miracles by their own power or for their own glory. The apostles perform miracles only through the power of Jesus’ Name, directing all praise and glory to the risen Lord!

What About Today?

Miracles still occur today. Some are big, some small; many are seen, many more are hidden. The question is not whether or not God still performs miracles but whether or not your heart is open enough to receive them.

You might want a miracle but don’t “need” one. God determines our wants and needs not on the persuasiveness of our argument but within the context of His will. It’s fine to pray for a miracle…you might just get it. It’s equally important, though, to trust in God’s love even if a miracle isn’t in the cards for you, today.

One miracle you can be sure of takes place upon that altar every Sunday. The early Church drew its strength from their Sunday worship (2:42). It was the source of their power and unity.

The Eucharist might not get you an “A” on your semester final, but it goes a long way in making sure you don’t fail your heavenly one.

St. Paul had to deal with a lot of “high minded”, philosophical types in his day. Most were very prideful, long on academics but short on humility. Some people back then claimed that Jesus didn’t really rise from the dead (as we celebrate this weekend). Rather than mince words, Paul gave it to them straight (in the verse up above). Many people will tell you that “based on human logic” the Resurrection makes no sense. The first thing we need to remember is that “human logic” is not omnipotence. God makes it very clear that “(His) ways are not our ways, nor are His thoughts our thoughts.” (Is. 55:8-9)

What is illogical is to think that “man” is the center of the universe. The truth is that Christianity is far more logical than many people give it credit for, certainly more “logical” than atheism or agnosticism. The second thing we should remind people is that any conversation about God is going to necessitate a degree of faith. If people are not willing to humbly admit that they don’t have all the answers than the conversation will go nowhere. God’s truth and human pride do not co-exist in the same space; that is the nature of sin. Humility and grace go hand-in-hand, as do pride and sin.

So, let’s remember that any conversation about the existence of God or the truth about Christ’s resurrection necessitate a humble admission that “it is possible that God exists” and that “we are not God.” When it comes to Easter Sunday, however, and the glorious truth about the Resurrection, to say that there is no logical truth to this belief, is not only ignorant, it is absurd.

Here are fifteen very quick facts that point to the truth of the Resurrection. These are not exhaustive or highly detailed; they are quick points that further strengthen what humble-hearted believers take on faith:

1. There was an empty Tomb

The founders of other “faiths” are buried in tombs or had their ashes sprinkled over foreign lands. Not Jesus. Modern “scholars” and directors can claim what they want on their cable specials…the truth is that the tomb was empty.

2. The Tomb had a Roman seal

Clay was affixed to a rope (stretched across a rock) and to the tomb, itself. The Roman seal was pressed into the clay. Break the seal, you break the law; break the law – you die.

3. The Tomb had a Roman guard stationed there

The “guard” was at least four men, possibly more, of highly trained soldiers. These soldiers were experts in torture and in combat, not easily frightened off by a band of fishermen and tax collectors. Had they fallen asleep or left their post they would have violated the law, resulting in their own execution.

4. The Tomb had a stone in front of it

Most scholars put the weight of the stone at about 2 tons (4000 pounds), probably at least seven or eight feet high. This was definitely a “team lift” or “team roll,” not movable by just one or two men.

5. There were post-resurrection appearances, to hundreds

Over a span of six weeks, He appeared to a variety of groups of various sizes in different locations. He appeared to over 500 at one point – a huge number to be an outright “fabrication”. Not to mention, the people whom He appeared to didn’t just “see” Him, but ate with Him, walked with Him, touched Him. Jesus even made breakfast (Jn 21:9) at one point.

6. The martyrdom of witnesses offers proof

Would people leave their businesses, careers, homes and families, go to the ends of the earth, die horribly gruesome and painful deaths and forsake their previous “religious beliefs about salvation” all to protect a ‘lie’? Not one of them, while being beheaded, fed to lions, boiled in oil, crucified upside down or burned alive ‘changed their story’. Instead, they sang hymns of trust and praise, knowing that the Lord who defeated death would raise them up, too.

7. There is still a Church

If the resurrection were a lie it would have died off centuries ago. The Christian Church is the largest institution of any kind in the history of humanity. This Church began with the apostles following Pentecost, the year Christ rose. It has conquered empires, withstood attacks (inside and out) and grown in spite of the sinfulness of its members, because it was founded by Christ, Himself, and is guided and protected by the Holy Spirit. The Church, like Christ, is both human and divine.

8. Jesus prophesied that it was going to happen

Jesus told people that it was going to happen. It didn’t “take Him by surprise.” And He didn’t just say “I’m going to be killed” (which others might have seen coming) but also that “I’m going to rise on the third day.” Those details aren’t ironic, coincidental or fortune-telling – they’re called prophecy and true prophecy comes from God, Himself.

9. It was prophesied in the Old Testament

It was foretold centuries before Christ, Himself, was born or lived it out. Hundreds of prophecies about the Messiah, what He would say, do, live like and how He would die – they were offered centuries apart by people God selected (most of whom never met one another, by the way). Isaiah, Jeremiah, Zechariah, Hosea and Micah (just to name a few) all pointed to Christ’s death and resurrection hundreds of years before they occurred.

10. The day of worship changed

Following the resurrection, tens of thousands of Jews (almost overnight) abandoned the centuries old tradition of celebrating the Sabbath on the last day of the week and began worshipping on the first day of the week the day on which the Lord, the Christ, beat death sealing the new and final covenant with God.

11. The practices of sacrifice changed

Jews were always taught (and taught their children – Deut. 6) that they needed to offer an animal sacrifice once a year, to atone for their sins. After the resurrection, the Jewish converts of the time, throngs of them, stopped offering animal sacrifices to God.

12. It is unique among other world religions

No other religious leader of any consequence every actually claimed to be God, except Jesus. No other religious leader ever did the things Christ did. No other religious leader ever backed up their “religious voice” with resurrection. Confucius died. Lao-tse died. Buddha died. Mohammed died. Joseph Smith died. Christ rose from the dead.

13. The message is self-authenticating

This proof goes back to the original point, namely, that a humble heart is enlightened and illuminated by far more than logic or reason. A true believer doesn’t need all the facts to believe in the resurrection, because the Holy Spirit reveals Christ to us, intimately and powerfully. St. Paul talks about this in 2 Corinthians 4. Blind and hardened hearts will never see God, not until they acknowledge that they are not Him.

14. The miraculous ending fits a miraculous life

You want logic? Christ healed the blind, the deaf and the dumb. He fed the masses, cured the lepers and forgave the sinners. He made the lame walk and brought others back to life. He multiplied food, walked on water and calmed storms with His mere voice. The miracle of Good Friday is that He didn’t call on a miracle. He died. The miracle of Easter Sunday is that He rose from the dead – a miraculous “end” to a miraculous life. What else should we expect?

15. (and the only answer we really need)…Jesus is still the answer

The world cannot offer any cure for suffering. The world can ignore it, berate it, debate it, bomb it and medicate it…but there is no cure or point to suffering separated from Jesus Christ. In Christ, our suffering has a point and it has worth. Apart from Christ, suffering is pointless and fruitless. There is no fountain of youth. There is no miracle drug. There is no cure for death except Jesus Christ.

What is illogical is to think that the God of life would not want us to live eternally. The only reason to think the resurrection is illogical is if you believe this life is your only one. This blog is not intended to begin debates or tear people apart. This is a very quick reminder to all of us Christians who might get too “logical” from time to time (myself included) that the resurrection is not illogical. That being said, all of us who do tend to be too logical might want to take a deep breath in contemplative prayer this weekend and really lean back in to the beautiful truth and reality of the crucifixion and resurrection.

“…how can some among you say there is no resurrection? If Christ has not been raised, them empty is our preaching; empty, too, your faith…if Christ has not been raised than your faith is in vain; you are still in your sins.” (1 Corinthians 15:12-18)

Brothers and Sisters, because of what happened in that Upper Room, on that Cross and in that Tomb 2000 years ago, we know God the Father intimately, we walk with Christ daily, and we are guided by the Holy Spirit eternally.

That’s the truth, and what a beautiful truth it is. (John 8:32)

“Great news! I got a promotion . . . and I’m ENGAGED!”

My friend went on and on sharing the romantic story of how her tall, handsome, Catholic man proposed. Everything in her life seemed to be the stuff of her dreams . . . and mine. As she was oozing with excitement, I smiled and was happy for her, but inside I had this strange, silent but sickly feeling of envy. There was this small part of me that wanted her to gain 10 lbs, break out with acne, or just stop talking. (Ok, not my finest moment).

Then as she was telling me how God had spoken to her miraculously through the prophetic gift in Adoration, my heart screamed: “God never speaks to me like that!” . . . I felt as though an invisible monster had taken over my heart. I should have been happy for my friend, but instead I was consumed with envy.

The Invisible Monster

Everywhere I look there seem to be people that can do things better than me. My roommate can play guitar and sings with a voice that sounds like a blend between Kelly Clarkson and enchanted angels. When I sing, cats squeal from all down the street. My athletic brother can run marathons while eating a Big Mac – That’s just wrong!

It seems like I’m surrounded by “-er” people . . . They’re pretty-er, funny-er, talented-er, just bett-er.

Unfortunately, when we try to measure ourselves up to others, we can be led into a very serious sin – Coveting our Neighbor.

What the heck does “coveting” mean? The Hebrew word translated “covet” is chamad (חמד) which is commonly translated into English as “covet,” “lust,” and “strong desire.”

In Exodus, God makes it clear to the people of Israel that they are not to covet their neighbor’s goods, servants, wife, his ox, or donkey (Exodus 20:17). Honestly? In all of my life I have never longed after a donkey. Seriously though, God might have chosen these words had he handed down the law today: “You shouldn’t desire after your friend’s x-box, clothing, their status, their cute boyfriend or girlfriend, their looks, their athletic skills, or their things.”

Unlike the other commandments which focus on outward actions, this commandment focuses on the human heart. It is an attitude that can sneak up on us before we even realize that’s what we are feeling.

Green with Envy

All of us may have had a moment when someone else has gotten something we really wanted. Maybe your friend always gets the “A” while you struggle to get a “C.” Or their parents are always buying them stuff like an X-box or a new car while your parents always say no, or can’t afford those things. Maybe you’d just like the attention that’s always lavished on the star jock and his cheerleader girlfriend. There is a part of your heart that wants to scream: “THEY SHOULDN’T HAVE THAT . . . I WANT IT!” That is coveting. That is envy . . . And we do it all the time.

The big issue with this sin is that it can be destructive to not only our own heart, but it can lead to destruction in relationships, bitterness, resentment, gossip, and ugly, malicious actions between friends and siblings. But at times we feel helpless to our feelings. How do we tame the monster?

How to Obey the Tenth Commandment

God tells us we can turn to him and resist sin. (James 4:7) Over the years, He has taught me a great tool for turning my envy to rejoicing.

Just SLAPP the envy:

• S: Stop and recognize the competition and jealousy in your heart.
• L: Look to Love. Remind yourself that God calls us to love our neighbors and be happy for their blessings. “Love is not boastful. Love is kind. Love is not jealous” (1 Corinthians 13).
• A: Ask for God to change your heart, remove jealousy, and give you the ability to love.
• P: Praise God for today’s blessing. Give thanks for his blessing on your friend.
• P: Praise God for tomorrow’s promises still to come! Boldly claim in faith that today you may not have everything you desire, but you trust in His love -that He knows you and loves you and has great plans for you…

It sounds something like this:

(Stop and Recognize your heart) Lord, I am so upset that Sarah has this amazing boyfriend. (Look to Love) I know you want me to be happy for her, but I can’t. I am jealous. (Ask for Grace) Please take this jealousy from my heart. Help me to be truly excited for her and celebrate with her. (Praise for today) Thank you for blessing Sarah with your gifts.Thank you for loving her. (Praise God for tomorrow) Lord, I KNOW you love me too, and you have great plans for me. And I wait with expectation for the blessing you have to bring in my life. Lord I trust in YOU!

You may have to say the last sentence over and over. I often do . . . But I promise you, it works and God is faithful! I encourage you today to stop comparing yourself to others and open your heart to the Love of Christ. His love will tame the invisible monster and give you power to rejoice with your friends and receive the blessings He has just for you.

“What color are my eyes?”

Guys, have you ever heard that before from a girl? It’s the carefully laid trap by a girl who knows when she is being looked at in a lustful way. Gentlemen, it can only get worse from there. Contrary to what we might think, there isn’t an answer that will equal a “get out of jail free” card like in Monopoly. Even if you manage to mumble through her correct eye color, chances are she is still feeling hurt from your eyes only looking at her body instead of appreciating her as a person.

It’s not only guys who struggle with this sin. Both guys and girls think that something as simple as checking a person out just for their “hot bod” isn’t a big deal. It is a big deal though, and any person can tell you they can feel the difference from when someone looks at them with love or with lust. It’s degrading.

You can look at the 9th commandment and think; “Coveting my neighbor’s wife” doesn’t exactly apply to me as a teen. Let’s take a deeper look at it and see precisely why it does apply to you.

It’s the Thought That Counts

In Matthew 5:28, Jesus says that, “Anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

When Jesus said this, it was completely radical, because he revealed that lust (something that happens inside your heart) is a sin just as much as an external action. What we think with our minds and desire in our hearts is a big deal.

“For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be. ‘The lamp of the body is the eye. If your eye is sound, your whole body will be filled with light but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be in darkness.” (Matthew 6:21-23)

At Mass on Sunday, we make a public confession and ask for forgiveness for not only our actions but for what goes on in the heart and mind:

“I confess to almighty God, and to you my brothers and sisters, that I have greatly sinned, in my thoughts and in my words”

Lust Wounds Love

When you lust after someone, either in physical actions or in thoughts, it wounds your ability to love and be loved. Lust is deliberately inflaming a sexual desire or temptation that naturally comes to you.

Pope John Paul II always said that loving is the opposite of using. Love requires sacrifice, responsibility and a total commitment to the other person. Jesus showed us the model referenced in Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church.”

A quick look at any crucifix will remind us how Christ loved the Church: by laying down his life! So when you reduce someone to an object for pleasure, it excludes God’s plan for love. Bishop Fulton Sheen once said that lust turns love into poison. Lust turns something that is designed to be given away (love) and turns it into something that’s only about “me” and what “I” can get from the other person.

Don’t confuse every lustful thought as a mortal sin. There’s a difference between thoughts that are brought on by ourselves and entertained and ones that pop up and are dismissed. Pray for help in the moment for Jesus to cleanse your mind of the image or thought!

Blessed Are the Pure of Heart (Matthew 5:8)

Just as looking at someone lustfully damages love and tears someone down, looking at someone lovingly affirms their dignity and can build them up. We have to untrain our eyes and hearts from lust and back to love. Purity in the heart is what we should strive for. God can clean the gunk built up in us through lust of the eyes and give us a heavenly vision.

“If, by love and right living, you wash off the filth that has become stuck to your heart, the divine beauty will shine forth in you. Think of iron, which at one moment is dark and tarnished and the next, once the rust has been scraped off, shines and glistens brightly in the sun. It is the same with the inner core of man, which the Lord calls the heart. It has been in damp and foul places and is covered in patches of rust; but once the rust has been scraped off, it will recover itself and once more resemble its ‘original design’ . And whoever is pure in heart is blessed because, seeing his own purity, he sees the ‘original designer’ reflected in the image” ~St. Gregory of Nyssa

Ask God to help you if you struggle with this sin. Here are some do’s and don’ts for the ninth commandment.

How To Obey The Ninth Commandment

Don’t

• Lust after another person, either in your thoughts or your actions. This damages your ability to love and be loved.
• Look twice. A girl I knew once said, “I know my dad looks at other women. But he never looks twice.” Be the witness when people around you are undressing a person with their eyes. It could change hearts even if they never tell you.
• Give up. It can seem like trying to stop a waterfall by cupping your hands under it, but purity is possible in the world today. It’s worth fighting for, and God’s grace is enough for us to do it!

Do

• Men, turn lust into a blessing. Praise God for His masterful artistry when you see a beautiful woman, don’t praise yourself and turn it into a disordered lustful reality. Use your bodies to glorify God in whatever you do (1 Corinthians 10:31).
• Build up and affirm brothers and sisters in Christ for modesty in dress, speech, and actions. It’s a battle to be pure and we need to hear encouragement in our walk.
• Filter what you feed your heart and mind when it comes to tv shows and movies. Know what causes you to sin and get rid of it from your life. “If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body thrown into hell” (Matthew 5:29).
• Pray for your future spouse every day. Place your trust in God to prepare that person to be with you for the rest of your life/bring you to Heaven. Trust Him to prepare you, too!

Scripture to meditate on:
Colossians 3:5, Matthew 5:8, Galatians 5:19-21, Matthew 15:19, 1 John 2:16, Ephesians 2:3, Galatians 5:16, Philipians 4:8, 1 Thessalonians 4:7

Catechism on the 9th Commandment: 2514-2527

My image of God the Father, enthroned in heaven in flowing white robes and Birkenstock sandals, was overshadowed by my certainty that he didn’t want me to have any fun. Not only was God all about rules, he’d drop anybody that strayed off his path. Parochial school should have taught me how to live but instead I learned how not to die and burn. The result was that I treated Moses’ Commandments with the same reverence I reserved for one of Letterman’s “Top Ten” lists.

So, my moral life was an exercise in hell avoidance. I feigned contrition with a half-hearted sincerity in hope that, should I die tonight, God would go easy on me. I knew how to say I was sorry for breaking the rules. I promised to stop doing the things I had just confessed even though I had no intention of doing so. I even knew my Act of Contrition. I apologized to God without knowing why my sins were sins. (As to that, years later as a married man I learned something about true contrition, namely, if you’re going to apologize, you had better know what you are apologizing for or else you’ll find yourself in even more trouble.)

I’m Sorry

For several years I saw confession as apologizing to a priest who “stood in” for God. If anyone had corrected this impression in religious education class, I missed it because I never listened. Later I learned that it isn’t merely a priest to whom I am confessing but truly, it is Christ. During reconciliation, the priest sits in persona Cristi capitas — in the person of Christ the Head. He offers not his mercy but that of Christ.

Later, also, I would come to understand the difference between apology and repentance and between the private and public nature of sin. In repentance you don’t merely turn away from something, you turn toward something else (see Acts 26:20). And my sin, no matter how private it is, has a ripple effect on those around me.

Everyone in my life suffers to some degree from my selfishness and sin; no sin is ever completely private since we are all bound together in one mystical body. The world looks down upon it as weakness, but as I matured, I came to see the beauty involved in humbling yourself and going before another, staring into the eyes of mercy, and admitting failure.

For years, my faulty understanding stymied my approach to Christ, keeping me from the greatest gift that God had to offer: total forgiveness. I totally failed to connect the dots given me in Catholic school and at countless Sunday Masses. It was only when sin and misery reached such a blinding level that I earnestly began to seek not fame or fortune but the peace that only Jesus can give that my approach to Christ began to change. I learned that St. Augustine was right when he said that we are all restless until we rest in the Lord.

SurMOUNTable Goals

In order to change a skewed understanding of the sacrament, it helps to realize Jesus came not to abolish the law, but to complete it (Matthew 5:17). He came to show us how to “have life and have it abundantly” (John 10:10).

I was not unique in my confusion. Many people today dismiss the moral code set forth in the Ten Commandments because they assume that religion as all about rules, conformity and some sort of guilt-ridden mind control. The doctrines of Christ, safeguarded by the Catholic Church, are dismissed as contrary to human freedom. In this context, obedience is seen as a form of weakness. By extension, Jesus Christ is viewed as the weakest man to walk the planet.

The question Catholic teens ask me most frequently in regard to sexuality is, “How far is too far?” What’s behind that question? What young people are really asking, once we look beneath the euphemistic wordplay is, “What exactly is everything I can do sexually—without going to hell?” They want to clearly delineate the line so they can approach it and tap dance on it, and then justify their behavior.

Can we mature in our understanding of the Law so that we mature in our approach to Christ and our readiness to receive God’s mercy? Well, let’s take a minute to look at it more closely:

The Law (Commandments)

Thou shalt not…

• Have other gods before me
• Take the Lord’s name in vain
• The Sabbath day holy
• Dishonor thy father and mother
• Kill
• Commit adultery
• Steal
• Bear false witness
• Covet thy neighbor’s wife (lust)
• Covet thy neighbor’s material goods

The Life in Christ (fulfillment)

Thou shalt…

• Be single-hearted toward me
• Be reverent in speech and conduct
• Keep priorities
• Be respectful and obedient
• Defend life, womb to tomb
• Be faithful to vocation, future spouse
• Be trustworthy
• Be honest in word and deed
• Have only pure admiration
• Be grateful for what you possess

Do you get it? Living a faith-filled life is not so much about what we shouldn’t do as about what we are called to do as we move forward in God’s love. You can use this parallel above as the beginning of your examination of conscience the next time you prepare for the sacrament of reconciliation. In particular, ask yourself how you measure up to the list on the right as you prepare your soul for the sacramental mercy of Christ.

An Excerpt from Blessed are the Bored in Spirit: A Young Catholic’s Search for Meaning